Today I

• Up to practice with D 8+.  Lots of starts, then a few 750m pieces.  They seemed really hard to me.  I'm a bit nervous about how much it'll hurt in the race.
• Home to snuggle with Kel.  Lovely time crawling back in bed with her after rowing in the cold.  She made good on her promises.
• Tried to get to county clerk today, but failed due to inadequate charge in electric car.  Learned Molly Stones has first hour free, and civic center has a charger. And clerk closes at 4 PM.
• Found a leak on one of the beam in the living room.  Went outside to seek a source, and felt a puddle on the roof. Went up to the roof, and sure enough, there was a puddle.  So Kel passed me her hair dying towel, and I used it to sop and wring the accumulated water.  I took pictures, will need to send to Janelle. Johann was amused that I was on the house, and Midori was totally freaked out. 
• Ordered in dinner from BJs.  The blue cheese bacon burger is a bit spicy.
• Johann was up several times during the night.  I think it was teething. I got up with him at 11, 11:20, Kel ws up at midnight, I got up at a bit after 2, and Kel again with him near 3.  We tried everything, can't confirm it's teething or not. 

Yesterday I

• Got up with Johann, then handed him off to his Mom so I could put in my contacts. She made him toast and blueberries for breakfast, and I sat with him at the table and ate cereal.  We played inthe house, and then I took him to the park with the small kid equipment.  I used my gray fleece (found in the car) to dry off slides and swings.  We first went on the little swing, then he played on the toddler tube slide.  He went down a few times, sometimes a little nervous, but figured it out on his own.  He discovered the gear shifts on the jeep cut outs.  Went down the small slide a few times, then over to the chimes for some ringing.  Loves the chimes.  
• Came home, but a nap wasn't in the cards.  Played in the garage in his cardboard house, with Midori following along. He did more pushing of his carts.
• Kel came home,heated up some quiche for her, and some for me.  Johann came over to me, asking for some, so I proceeded to feed him quiche by hand.  He took down most of my piece,and most of a second piece. On a body weight basis, that's like me eating the whole quiche.
• I started to replace the blinds in his room.  He was standing in his crib, didn't really like it.  Tried to get him to go down, but no luck.  At one point, he just started to really cry, so I went in and cuddled him.  He was tired and wanted to sleep in my arms, but didn't wan to be put down.  I held him in the big chair, thinking this wasn't a bad way to spend a Saturday afternoon.
• Eventually gave up on naps, but did some great walking pushing of his cart.  If I support his chest so he can't go too fast forwards, he can walk behind the pusher, and will do it for a few feet.  Progress!
• Larke & Jon & Griffin came over, with an insulated growler for me for a present.  We had a nice dinner of paella and salad.  Griffin is big, with many words, and walking well. He's a bit of a bruiser with Johann, I think he doesn't play with other kids, or smaller kids.  Johann ended up crying a few times when he was treated roughly.

Today I

• Rowed my practice in a very strong rain.  Adrian was missing but we picked him up on the dock after the early warm up.  We practiced formally doing start 5, 5 high, and then shifting up for the next 15.  Were going from 40 on the 5 to 42 for the high.  Feel like we're burning a lot of fuel to do that, but it seems fast.  I'm a bit fearful of the 2k, don't know that I'm as well trained for it as i was last year.  The practice pieces are hard.
• Did a car switch at the boat house with Kel, and took little man straight home, where I fed him fresh cantaloupe and toast with butter and strawberry jam. He did "monster face" with just a verbal cue while I fed him. 
• I tried to put him down for a nap, but after about 45 minutes he suddenly was crying very loudly.  I went in to find he'd thrown all his snuggy toys out of his crib.  He did not want a nap, so we played.  In the garage, I tried him on his walker toys again, and he managed to push while walking on his knees.  That's better than nothing.  I put the wood one with the clattering alligators in the house with him, and he managed a few actual walking steps behind it.  This is a good sign.
• Johann took a spill off the futon while playing with me. He reached for one of the pictures of me and Kel standing on the ground, missed, and started to fall/ roll off the futon.  I reached for him, half caught him in his roll, and ended up spinning him to his back for the fall, which means he hit the back of his head, and scooted into another painting.  I sat there for a few seconds, trying to figure out how to help him, as I couldn't move my hands without letting the paining fall on him. I picked him up and held him, and he cried for a while, but snuggled in.  I felt bad.  I don't think it was a bad bump, but I want to be more careful with situations like that, i just need to be in a better position to catch him.  I was too far away, and lying with him meant I couldn't move fast enough.  
• Kel came home with groceries, I helped put those away, changed the head light on my car, and shared my burrito with little man for lunch.  He went down for a nap, and Kel and I napped together, too.  SHe got up before I did (as always, because I sleep for longer) and cooked a ton of food for the week.  Chicken, paella, quiches.  I enticed her to come back to bed with me.
• Fed mini man a good dinner of chicken, one of his pouches, cheese stick, and avocado.  Kel made an amazing salad with the newly roasted chicken, arugula, blue cheese, avocado, dried cherry, cheery tomato.  It was great.  Johann kept coming by and standing next to me as i ate, so I would pop blue cheese or avocado in his mouth.  He hadn't finished his avocado, but the same avodaco, when mixed in my salad, became interesting.  Kel played the "i can see you" game from the other side of the table, and he laughed.  I crawl followed him down the hall and tickled him.  He laughed.
• Saw Jay and Dianne for beer and ice cream.  Johann loves their light fixture which is like the wind chime.  He also liked some of the girls books, which are a larger form than is own.  He got to try some vanilla and mint chip ice cream.  He liked them, even though the cold was a bit surprising.
• Skyped with Andrew tonight, talking about Tesla, cartels, unions. He hopes to Move to LA, is working towards that.  Has temp work for the next 2 weeks.
• Spent time on the couch with Kelly talking about how important it is to leave some sense of ourselves for the future.  The facebook pictures of the portraits of my great great great grandparents, done int he 1830's has me thinking.  I wonder who they were as people.  I wonder how they thought about things.  I hope this reaches my great great great grandchildren. I hope they'll think well of me, though I'm sure some aspect of my thinking will seem barbaric to them.  I'm doing my best to take care of myself and my family and to make the world better.  It seems hard, there are so many problems, and so many powerful people who are happy with things just how they are.

Today I

• Went with Kel to Pacific fertility.  Green light to move forwards. Lining is good.
• Wrote birthday thank you note on my ferry ride back from the city.  Got a chicken pesto sandwich at the farmer's market stand at the ferry terminal.  It was good.
• Ended up trading with Kel as Johann wanted a bath, but with daddy.  
• McCarthy's Bane Imperial Red was really good and worth sharing.

Today I

• Up to row.  Boat went well.  2 x 1500 on the bay + 2 x 800 in the creek. We were concerned the women weren't out of the way of a ferry.  Pieces went OK, but we lost our length once when we tried to go fast without staying long or organized.
• I got little man out of bed this morning.  He likes his new room configuration, I think.
• Picked up tiny Man from daycare,a nd has positive confirmation that he understands words.  His first obviously understood phrase: "Monster Face".  He makes his faces upon hearing only the words, without any other cues that that's what's expected.  It's a term he will have learned form us, and only in the last month or so, so it means he probably understands more.  It's really cool, and goes a long way towards making us feel a bit less worried. 
• For some reason, Johann thinks the beer in the door of my keg fridge is hilarious.  I had him in my arms with the door open, and he just died laughing, tried to grab the bottles, pull off their caps.
• I set up a few tupperware buckets for him to put blocks in.  He played with that a little.  He's more into putting things into and taking them out of other things, so this is better for him to interact with the blocks. 
• I got out his (slightly melted crayons, and spread some user wrapping paper on the hexagonal table for him to try to use the crayons. He understood it a little bit, but kept wanting to eat the crayons.  We moved the operation tot he floor, still limited interest, but we'll keep trying.

Today I

• Up early for SDCC 8+.  Alan missed his alarm so had Muriel from the women's team in 3 in front of me.  It was drizzling as I left the house, so I made sure I had my hat.  As soon as we launched, in the creek, it poured.  Adrian was commenting, which was funny, but didn't make it any easier to just sit and take it before we were really warmed up.  Had a really good 35 at the end of the practice.
• Home, and Kel and Johann were still in bed.  Crawled back in bed, as i was wet and cold, and had a lovely snuggle with Kelly.
• It's a bad sign when every conversation with your boss makes you hate your job and want to quit.
• Kel got a call from jade today about issues with James.
• Kel skyped with James tonight while I fed and played with little man.  He raided Kelly's feminine supply drawer. He's getting more steady standing up and walking through his gate.
• Kel and I re-arranged Johann's room today so he'd not by by the door and able to play with the light switch.

Today I

• Did 1 minute on, 1 minute off in a hybrid of the club and D 8.  Joel, Sean, Michael B, me, Raoul, Bob, Mike S, Mike Mc. with Adrian. I think it went well.  Lovely sun rise.  The moon is barely a sliver.  Sky had a lot of pinks.
• Came home, and everyone was asleep, so I crawled in bed with Kel.  Had some cuddles, then little man woke up.  Kel tended to him, and then brought him in to me, and he and I played in the bed a bit.  He flopped his head on my chest in his hug snuggle attack.  Super cute.  He knows to look form my underwear drawer on the side of the bed, and wants to open it, which he can do.
• Working on permissions to hire.
• Kel and I had a long tough chat about her worries right now.  Career, Johann's development, health care, babies.  It's a tough cocktail. The cover California site is awful.  Told her to press a button that wasn't there, kept throwing date format werrors when dates were entered via the sit's own calendar pop up.  Insane.
• TOnight we have Xana and Sirelei over for dinner.
• It was super.  Opened very old beers, everyone had a good time.  Lemon rosemary chicken, roasted cauliflour, grilled asparagus, corn bread, which came out well because I used a lot more shortening on the pan. made the edges crispy. Met Sirlei's son, who wants to be a science guy, needs some mentorship.

Yesterday I

• Saw Kelly leave the house by 6 Am to get her flight for San Diego from Oakland.  She had a one day business trip down there.  She wore black boots and a longer but slightly fitted black skirt and black top.  She looked great.
• I took Johann to daycare.  He cried when I left, and I felt really bad about it.  Sirlei texted me a smiling picture of him soon after I was home.
• I figured out which real time indices would be possible for Boroughs and outcodes, and sent that off to the product team.
• I got Kelly yellow roses with orange edges before picking up Johann.  I took him home, put him in the pack and walked him to the park by the pool. We went on the slide a few times, and eventually the swing.  A 12 month old named Will walked over to us while Johann was sitting by the backpack, rummaging through, taking things out, and putting them back.
• Johann went on the swing a little, then I put him down on the sand.  He just sat kind of grabbing and digging with his hands for a bit,then started to crawl.  I had to intervene a few times to make sure he didn't try to eat it.  He saw me draw in the sand with a stick, and tried to do the same, and did a decent job.
• At 6 I packed him up for home, and he got a little fussy when we were most of the way there, so I carried him.
• Fed little man chicken that Kel had mashed the prior night, along with some vegetable pouch stuff.  He got a little fussy, so I held him and fed him some more.
• We got on Skype with mom and Grandma.  Grandma's knitting an afghan.  Johann did some cruising down the length of the bench, which both grandma's got to see.
• He and I took a bath together.  He was a little shy getting in, I think it was too hot.  Then eventually he was done, after I had him lie there a bit without too much support.  It might have scared him a little.
• I gave him milk and banana yogurt a bit before bed time. He fussed a little, but then settled in.
• Kel came home about 10, and we stayed up talking for a while.

Today I

• Felt a bit rough this morning.  Got up when Johann started to stir.  Fed him some oatmeal and milk while Kel went to swim. 
• Took Johann to the grocery store.  He rode in the cart (first time in the cart in the grocery).  I fed him some red raspberries from the container.  He was happy, I just wanted him happier.  I tucked the bananas and lemons in the seat next to him.  He was amused by all the things.  He reached behind him to grab the "pouches" when I put them in the cart, and played with one for the duration of the trip.
• When I got home, Johann was very patient in his car seat while I unloaded the car.
• I de-boned some breasts and set aside marinade for lemon rosemary chicken for Tuesday, and also made turkey chili (with chicken bits, too). Kel fed him lunch while I worked.
• Got a replacement headlight for my car.  WHen I cam back little man was in bed.
• Kel and I had snuggle time on the bed.  Talked about many things, among them some less than mainstream things, but with some new possibilities.
• When Bug woke up we put him in the backpack for a short walk to an open house in our neighborhood, then on to the park by the pool, then to Weezie's.  Johann enjoyed the fries, but chipmunked his raspberries. It was funny.
• At home I cooked while Kel played with little man in the garage.  I suggested she skype her sister.
• They chatted whith mini man while I finished cooking.  I ended up tutoring Haley with her chem.  pH, ions, titration. I remember a lot.
• Had Trois Pistoles from Unibroue.  Awesome.
• Tomorrow Kelly flies to San Diego for a day trip.

Today I

• 4 x 1 k in the 8.  Started off with the 8 of extras for SDCC beating us in the warm up, and I thought we were in for a bad day.  They held us OK for the first minute or so in the pieces, but then we started to move.  First piece was actually more like 1500, with Dustin starting us at the wrong piling. We were all hurting after that one, and I felt my cold a bit.  I could feel how sick I was, or at least, felt very sick.  I didn't think I could handle the rest of the workout, butt hen the rest of the pieces were actually the right length.  We based 34 ok, and sprinted 36 well, though our 37 got short and may not have been much faster.  Good fro two weeks out.  I need to push hard these next 2 weeks.
• Had Johann at home this morning and made him bacon and scrambled eggs and nutmeg oatmeal. I don't know if he'd had bacon before.  I gave him small bits, and mixed the small bits with his eggs. He liked it.
• I had a nap.  Kel let me sleep for 90 minutes, and it was still hard to wake up, but she came in with Johann and he was playful in the bed. He opened my sock and underwear drawers, and then maybe got the idea to use the open drawer to climb into the bed.
• I got my hair cut again today by Tasia Scott, who is just great.  Back to my Euro soccer hair. I watched Johann while Kel got her hair cut.  He climbed onto the little activity table they had and then onto the chair between us before we could notice what was going on.  He's getting better at climbing.
• Christopher came over with Cynthia, whom we met for the first time. I poured the last of the 2010 holiday lager for him, and sent him out with 2 22's of the current version. Johann also sampled the 2010 HL.  I poured him a tiny bit in one of the paddle cups, which he wanted to drink from. He liked it.
• Had dinner with John, Suzanne and Jasper.  Johann was a champ in his bolt on seat.  I fed him his dinner, and then most of Kelly's mashed potatoes from hers, some yogurt, some veggie puree, and then some lobster form my plate (first lobster!) and some tiramisu from my dessert (first tiramisu!).  He guzzled tons of milk, had to order some to refill his sippy cup.  
• Johann fell asleep in his seat on the way home.  He startled a bit as I tried to get him out at home, but fell asleep immediately.  I gently carried him into the house and placed him in his crib.  He settled into his snuggy furry blanket with his usual kicking, and was happy.  He woke about 11 and I got up with him.  A little milk in a sippy cup seemed to do it.  He awoke 2 AM ish, and we think it was because he was cold.  Kel got up with him. 

Today I

• Got the greatest hug from Johann before putting him in his car seat after daycare. He just cuddled in and held on.  It was beautiful.
• At the park, he discovered the chimes built into the side of the slide climbing platform, and happily played with those and shook his little behind.  I got video.
• Got pizza and had John & Vanessa over. I opened my original Belgian from 2011.  It was great.  Lots of Maillard time.  Also had the buffalo Belgian stout from Beer lift.  Body was more slight than I recalled.  Yummy. 

Today I

• Had a good row with the 8+.  After doing work to push rates, came back and did work where 32 was easy, 34 was good, and 36 was a little high.  We're making progress.
• Accompanied Johann to his ISR final today, where he had to right himself in the pool in full clothes.  It was hard to watch.  He got water in his nose, which I could see him clear when he surfaced by exhaling it out his nose.  There were several moments when his face was under so much longer than I could stand.  Each time, right as I was about to say something and intervene, he'd manage to get his face out of the water and get a breath.  He managed all the key skills in full clothing, which is impressive. When we got him out of the pool, he puked.  Kel was with him, but couldn't really move him fast enough.  Good news was he was coming out of all his wet clothes anyway.  Bad news is I forgot to pack his water, and felt awful we couldn't give him something to rinse his mouth.  But I had brought him a chocolate set of red lips from my party, which had gotten soft in my pocket, and so I fed him little chocolate nibbles while we dressed him in warm clothes.  He clung to me so hard.  He really is scared, and doesn't want to be left alone in the water like that.
• After daycare, I took him to the park. The solid pine cones at the tips of the tree he likes had bloomed into poofy male cones.  Johann thought they were hilarious.  We did some swing, and then played in the grass.  I got down with him and rolled away from him, and he thought rolling was funny.  He also was fascinated with my hood.  I showed him he had a hood, too, which he didn't like as well.  The height of comedy was when he managed to climb up a big step on the slide platform, and then stand and found himself taller than I, who was on the ground.  Big big laughs at this.  

Today I

• Was a bit unwell, I think I got Johann's cold
• DId a call with Meg to go over some work I'd done for her new shelter
• Had a promising meeting about the front end for my new index
• Went to Dinner with Doug and Andrew at Beer works.  Great chat, good to see them in CA.
• Johann passed the first part of his swim test today

Today I

• Good row with the 8.  Not as sharp as we could be at 34, but getting there
• Kel got good news about a job possibility
• I think I'm starting to get a cold, so we stayed in with mini man tonight.  He figured out the sliding screen door to the patio, demonstrated fearless cruising under the table moving from chair to chair, and seems to understand the word "light". Fed him his favorite refried beans.  He also seems to like spicy french fries.  And blue berries.
• Noticed my hops are coming up.  Vines look thick!  I may need some extra serious trellising.
• Activated the irrigation system, but on a low setting.  Need to save the gardens.

Today I

• Spent the morning with Kel & Johann.  I helped Kel master the new carseat.
• Worked on a response to a naively critical client.
• Took tiny man to the park where he scooched himself down the straight slide all by himself.  He laughed on the twisty slide, and it was the epitome of comedy when I pushed my fingers through the holes in the floor grate on the playground equipment.
• Fed him dinner at home. Later he wanted my burrito, soI fed him beans and avocado and rice and shrimp from it.  He loved it.
• Took little man in the bath with me.  He splashed and had a great time Midori cat watched. 
• Tiny man is doing a ton more aggressive cruising now.  Really seems to want to stay on his feet.

Today I

• Took little man to the park via backpack while Kel was at swim practice.  Ran into Jay & Dianne and the girls there.  Had a good chat.  Little man was a bit fussy on the way home, so i carried him.
• During his Nap, Johann somehow managed to get his pants off.  They were found in his crib with him.  He was laughing.
• Let little man crawl around outside.  Got a lot of pictures of him in the front yard with Midori.  He tried to eat pebbles, and a fist full of dirt.  I tried to stop him.
• Dinner with May and Billy tonight.  Corned beef and traditional boiled dinner.  Drakes's imperial stout, which is awesome.  Little man had the same, though his went through the grinder, and he loved it.  Took many pictures there, too.

Yesterday I

• Met a work contact in SF for beers. He's over on business and got in touch, so I took him to Monk's kettle.  His friend is the personal assistant to the new Kodak CEO.  I kept him on the Wit and tripel, and ordered her the dunkelweissen. I did well.  He told me about sailing around the world on a yacht.  Amazing stuff.
• Realized how I need to handle my career for the next year, and what some exit options might look like.
• Had a vanilla stout in the garage with kel when I got home, and Johann buzzed around on the floor.  He's gotten good at asking for us to open doors for him.  He can communicate pretty well. 

Today I

• Had a satisfying row with the 8.  3 x 2K, 30 (1K)-32 (500m)-34, 30 (500m)-32 (1k)-34, 32(1k)-34 (700m) 36.  Went pretty well.
• Changed Johann in the back of the car before driving him home.
• Fed munchkin strawberries in oatmeal.
• Put him down for a nap, but when that didn't work, got him up and played with him in his room. He kept coming over to snuggle me, snuggle his bears.  He'd lie on top of me and try to settle in, thump on my chest.  So sweet.
• I planted my garden today (well, started all my seeds).  I'm about a month late.  Oh well.
• We took Johann for yet another haircut.  It came out great and he looks super cute!
• We got little man his big boy car seat today.  I installed it in the babies r Us parking lot.  Not hard, but took some time to figure it out the first time through.
• Had Mexican dinner in the city with Shannon and Heidi.  Little man was intrigued by the college basketball on TV.  he still loves refried beans and guacamole.
• He fell asleep on the way home.  I gently slipped him out of his seat, and slowly carried him into the house.  I remember being carried in from the car by my parents from time to time. The best times were when we'd fall asleep on a long car trip some place, and we'd wake up, and be at Grandma's house.  Either being carried in, or wake up the next morning and be there.  I thought about Johann maybe carrying his kids into the house from the car some day.  It's one of the most loving things. I feel like such a good dad when I can get him in without waking.  Of course, he slept through his mom setting off the fire alarm today, during his nap, so perhaps I congratulate myself for something that's actually not hard. Still, such a joy to gently snuggle him into the house and into bed.

Today I

• Solid row in the 8, though we think we're still inefficient at the front end.
• Great chat with John about the stuff that matters in life. He cares about what the planet will be for those many generations from now. He's thinking bigger thoughts about what he wants to be doing with his time.  The biggest point is, you don't have to follow any one else's rules.  Do what matters now.
• Great news that little man's chemical work all came back normal.  He's just aging at 2/3 the speed of other kids.... More work to be done, but at least we eliminate many big issues.

Today I

• Woke up with my alarm, but spent time with Kel talking in the dark before going to the boathouse for some weight work.
• Took Johann with Kel to get his blood drawn for the metabolic tests.  He was fine until the tourniquet went on.  He didn't know what it meant, just that it was a weird situation.  I held him and Kel comforted him.  The lab tech was very professional, and very good with him.  She was gentle.  She had a hard time finding a vein, and had to probe with the needle a few times to get one.  It was hard to watch, but I knew that it was what we had to do, and to quit and start over would be worse.  It was over pretty quick, and Johann settled down fast after getting some daddy snuggles. He's so resilient.
• Sirlei sent us some happy pictures of him from daycare.  
• I did a lot of management work today, very little creation or analysis.
• Took video of little man on the swing at the park, making faces.  So cute.  Posted it to facebook. Kel tried to meet us at the park, but met us at the sushi place instead.
• John from next door came by, we had sushi and did a side by side of Saison Dupont and my Saison, which Kel preferred, as did I.  Pretty cool moment.
• Little man had some more fun garage time, and also communicated that he wanted a drink by going for our glasses, until we got him his sippy cup.

Today I

• Good row in the very dark with my SDCC 8+ .  Did ad a pair, some tecnical work.  Our front end could still be a bit better.
• Arrived home right when Johann was waking up.  Had some time with him before work, then handed him off to Kelly.  He played in his crawling tunnel.
• Took Johann to see Dr. Cohen because of his little diaper rash thing that won't go away.  That's easily solved.  But the doctor noted his still very small size, that his soft spot in his skull hadn't yet closed, and that he's behind developmentally with words and walking.  We're going to do the blood test to see if there's anything chemically wrong.  I'm really nervous, in all directions.  I think my biggest fear is we've not caught it soon enough and he's suffered some kind of permanent developmental setback.  I hope that's not true.  At this point I don't know what to hope for, though.  I feel bad signing him up for a needle, but we really need to know if there's something requiring intervention. I don't know if I'll be more relieved for them to find something, or find nothing.  Something is (I hope) treatable and (I hope) reversible.  Nothing is good because there's nothing, it's just mysterious why he's so slow to do all of these things.
• Called my mom to talk about it.  It was good.  She re-assured that I'm doing all i can and that kids are resilient.  I miss her and grandma.  I wish we weren't all so far apart. 
• Took Johann to the big park after daycare.  A brief stint in the swing, a lot of carrying around to the trees he'd point to.  Did some climbing on the small slide. We went down the tunnel slide a few times, and a sweet little girl there called me daddy a few times. Kel surprised us by finding us at the park after some meetings in the city.  Johann surprised us by making a very new and funny face intentionally.  He raises his eyebrows, locks his jaw open, sticks out his tongue.  It's a combination shock and surprise, and he's doing it intentionally to get a laugh.  I think he learned this in his games with Grayson.  He kept doing it for me and Kel, and we laughed and laughed, and he'd laugh. He was in such a good mood.  It was well timed, for him to show us something new and clever yesterday.  Gives me hope and confidence that he's developmentally going to be OK.
• We skyped with my mom after Johann's dinner.  He played peekaboo with mom when we let him cover his own face with the red tea towel, or when we covered the iPad for mom.  He made the face for her a few times.  Too funny.
• Right before bed, he followed Midori to the cat door to the garage.  He then indicated he wanted the door opened, so I indulged him.  He LOVED the new floor out there Kel put in.  He crawled around as fast as he could, exploring everything.  Brooms, beer archive.  He didn't want to leave.  We'll have to do more of that.
• Chatted strategy with Kel on her career stuff.

Today I

• Stroked the 4- with Raoul, Bob, and John Y. We did ok, but were a bit too antsy at the front end.
• Played with Johann through the window of his room when i got home.  Kel was getting him up, and we both touched the screen together.  I carried him around the house before daycare, and gave him his milk from his sippy cup.  He wore his frankenstein monster bib and made a mess.
• I did some crunching for Meg, helping her track what happens with her animals.
• Started looking for publish rules for the new index
• Picked up little man with Kel and took him to the park.  He guzzled his milk and got it everywhere. Kel fed him dinner.  He wants to feed himself with a spoon, which is cute.  He's not great at it, but he has to start some place.
• After dinner he cuddles with mom, and thought it was hilarious when he found me crawling under the table to get the morsels of food dropped there before he found them.  We had his crawling tube out, and he laughed and laughed crawling through it and coming back around the other side.
• Shared an IPA from 101 brewing in Petaluma with Kel.  It was a fine example of the style.

Today I

• Had Johann to myself this morning while Kelly swam.  I tried to mix mango in his oatmeal, but they just weren't soft enough for him.  Mixed a little strawberry jam.  He pointed to the little wooden windchime Jinn had sent for my birthday, hanging from the light fixture above the dining table.  He likes it, so I would stir it for him, and he'd smile, and point at it again.  I took some video of this.
• I had him in the front yard when Kel came home from swimming.  He was exploring the dandelions.  The grass was dewy and he got a little wet, but I didn't care.
• We then played together in the big bed.  He was happy and giggly frolicking on the big bed with him mom and dad.
• I woke Johann from his morning nap.  I did it slowly.  Tied up the red sarong that is the shade in his room. Spoke to him, then slowly rubbed his back. 
• We took him to the park for the slide and swings.  We let him crawl in the grass, as this week he's learning dandelions.  There was a track in the grass where he'd crawled from one patch of yellow flowers to the next.  I think his favorite color is yellow.
• Bug didn't sleep much for the afternoon nap.  When I went in to get him he was already standing in his crib, and he smiled and bounced to see me because he knew I was getting him up.  I love his enthusiasm.
• Started thank you notes for my party.
• Was sad listening to the Beatles Let it Be album tonight.  Kelly's Dad, and memories of my dad in Ft. Wayne listening to songs on that album at night after we were in bed.  I remember his mix tape.  Stuff from the Moody blues, Beatles.  I should try to rememebr all the songs.  Maybe I'll make a spotify playlist of it.
• Skyped with Jinn tonight, put it on the TV via Apple TV. Johann kind of understood. Kel fed little man dinner.
• I played with tiny man, we chased each other, crawling, around the hexagonal table. He'd laugh and laugh.  I'd catch him and tickle his feet. He'd laugh.  He comes over to me and just snuggles me so much, it breaks my heart.  I'd spend eternity in a snuggle from him.  He's so sweet and sincere.

Today I

• Did better on my 2k test than I thought I would.  Manages a 1:42 for the first 500, aimed for 1:43 for the second, and found myself at 1:42.5 at 1 K in, and decided to push.  I felt pretty good in the final 750.  My only regret is that I counted last 10 to myself, and then stopped, when I probably had one more stroke to go.  6:46.4.
• Had a great row in the SDCC 8+, without Mike.  Adrian had us, and I think we made him happy, which is always good.  I was in 4 seat.  we did 4-3-2-1 10 min pieces.  For the second piece, last 3 min shift he asked me, bob, Raoul and Breard to just kill, and we did and the boat really moved.
• After the row, Kel was on the dock with Johann, still trying to show him that daddy's in the boat.  He still doesn't quite understand that it's me.
• I kept Johann for the Olympic flag signing of two former MRA juniors who went on to the Olympics. Dick Draeger was there, and it was great to see him.  There's so much i want to say, and then say so little of it.  I think I may regret that.  Wendy Wertz spoke of the juniors having to learn to come from behind.  I said they need to learn what to do when things don't start off as you'd expect.  Dick said "just keep working". I'm amazed at him.

• Johann keeps wanting to try to feed himself.  He's a very good non-verbal communicator that he wants to try to pour the "chouch" onto his spoon, and then to try to feed himself with the spoon.  I want to give him some freedom to try it and to learn, just fear it'll be a total mess.  I changed him and put him down for a nap at 10:30.  We're hoping to help him manage the time zone change.
• I made chicken Mole for friends who just had a new baby.  I shredded it just now after it slow cooked over night.
• We looked for a new carseat for Johann
• We visited John & Vanessa and saw Vanessa's cool workshop. I offered to get John growing hops.
• Johann ate peanutbutter cookies for the first time.
• Lovely evening with Suzanne and John and Jasper.  Poured Hefe and double Wit, brought John seeds from my garden. Johann crawled around happily after dinner.

Today I

• Rowed a straight 4 with Raoul, Bob, and C. Hamlin from CBC.  Beautiful sunrise, calm water.  I was in 2, and called the workout. Some pauses, some building 10s and 20s. A good time.
• I went with Kel to Johann's swim lesson.  He still cries so much, and it's so hard for me to watch him deal with having his face under water, but he can right himself and he can float.  I don't know if he'd survive a pool encounter alone, but I know his odds are better now.  Still, it's so hard on me to watch him struggle and be frightened that he can't get air or that he'll sink.
• Had a skype chat with Steve.  He told me about his album he's written, and his 4 horsemen song.  I told him about the tough time I'm having right now. He may come out here in April.  I told him I wish we were all in touch more, and told him about the idea that, when I ask myself at the end of the day, whether, if this day were selected for me to be the one day I re-live forever, what would I regret about it? My answer comes back often that I didn't communicate with my family. It's a big hole, and a potential source of much regret.  I hope we talk more. I should find a way to make that happen. 

Today I

• Had my first outing in the SDCC lineup for the E 8+.  Conditions were calm and quiet.  We had a bit of an odd starboard lean/ dip, but we were lightyears faster than the other boat. 
• Came home to have some time with Johann.  Fed him some milk and O's and some blueberries from my arms, because he was a little hungry.  I handed him an old mini tangerine, to have something to hold, and he tried to bite into it.  Swapped it for an orange, and he tried to bite that, too.  Thus, blueberries were called in.
• Kel is home with me today. We talked about plans for the next few months, of vacation, my work travel, her birthday, and trying for another baby. It's a lot to juggle. We made good decisions to wait for more information from our fertility appointment before trying to make decisions.
• I finished reviewing Matt's results of my new real time index algorithm, and it's working great.  We still have a little work to do to get them all tuned ideally,a nd to screen out the bad ones, but that's not too tough.  It's really exciting.
• Kelly made Thai curry, and went into the city for a networking thing
• I'm going to get little man early and take him to the park

Today I

Today I:

• Chose to spend the morning snuggling in bed with Kelly. Spooning and napping. When Johann woke up we changed him and gave him a little drink,and then brought him to bed to snuggle between us.  He played with the Indian tapestry above the bed which he now can reach, and played with our faces, and generally snuggled us. It was the best thing I could have done with the time.
• Kelly had a big pitch for Napa valley today, and she looked amazing when she left. The ideas were cool.  Stylized posters like for the iconic SF areas, and the media strategy was smart.
• When Kel came home, she Johann and I went to the grocery store together.   I carried Johann in his pack, and he held onto an organic lemon for about half the trip.  He dropped it some place, and we went back to find it.  No luck.  Gave him a new lemon.  He decided to start teething it in the check out line.  He didn't like it. Gave him a blueberry and he was better.  I handed him one of his pouches to keep his hands busy while in checkout.  He held it the whole time, such that i forgot he had it until I had paid.  I turned to the cashier and told him we forgot to scan and pay for the pouch he'd been holding the whole time.  He told us not to worry about it and to just go.  So Johann did his first shoplifting at the age of 15 months.
• Made Asian-influenced dinner of caramelized onion, mushroom, eggplant with chicken. Blended some for Johann and he loved it.
• Johann had a blonde top knot from daycare today.  Maybe time for yet another haircut.

Tough time

Today I:

• Had a good row in the 4- with Paul, Alan, and Raoul
• Carried Johann this morning and played with him before daycare.  We played with his pegs and his music blocks.  I tried to teach him "red" and "green" and "peg" and "block" with the red and green pegs and red and green blocks. Still only a lot of "MMMM" sounds from him.
• Took Johann to his swimming lesson. Kelly had a call that ran late.  He got a bit anxious as soon as I picked him up, and I'm afraid he gets that by sensing my feelings. I hate to see him frightened and crying.  Sirlei said he was trying to take steps between two high chairs.  It made me very sad to think I'm likely to miss his first steps, because they'll happen at daycare.
• Had a very hard time leaving Johann back at daycare after swimming.  He just wanted to be held by me, and cried when I handed him over.  I cried in the car and at home. It breaks my heart.  I know why people stay home with their children.
• Made butternut squash soup for dinner with the squash from the garden. Johann likes it.
• Found my missing camera battery.  Fully charged, nearly.  I'm back in business for taking pictures! 
• I took video of picking up little man from daycare, and of him on the swing at the park.
• Put him in the pack when I came home to make him dinner and fed him chicken and the squash soup and yogurt.
• Had a challenging time getting him into his sleepy clothes because he's such a wiggle monster on the changing table.  Resorted to putting him on the floor.
• He cried when I put him in his crib. He really wants to stay up with us.  He likes to play with the light switch on the wall right by his crib.  I gave him a little milk because I thought he might be a little hungry.  He stopped crying after a short while,but stayed up for a bit, talking to himself, which is adorable. 

Today I

• Steered the straight 4- with Bob, John Y, and Joel.  We were faster at higher rates when we shortened our length a bit.
• Ordered contact refills
• Worried a bit about Russia invading Crimea
• Started this blog and one for Johann
• Andrew helped break down the tent/ room Kelly made for my birthday party
• Enjoyed the home made chocolates from Raoul & Wendy
• Enjoyed having Kelly's company as she worked from home
• It was a gray day and drizzly, but we need it for the drought
• Had the turkey Cobb at iron springs with Johann and Kelly and Andrew.  Fed little man the avocados from my salad while he sat in his clamp chair at the high table
• Let Andrew drive the Leaf into SF
• Had Amazing corn flour churros with Andrew, Dennis, and Ryan
• Had to charge up a bit at the ferry terminal on the way home